“A new year, a new me.”
Well that’s what they all say, but who really changes? The thing is, as the new year progresses, there often come a lot of changes.
I remember about this time last year I was freaking out because it was 2014, and 2014 was the year I was going to graduate high school. That really freaked me out: change. However, 2014 turned out to be filled with more changes than just the fact that I gradated. It really turned out to be a great year.
2014 was the year:
- I was trying to rebuild my sense of self after a hard break up.
- I gained many new friends.
- I also lost a majority of those close friendships after I left for college.
- I was in a musical, where I met a group of all new friends.
- I created countless memories with that group of people before I left town for college.
- I gained a better sense of myself and who I am, while leaving behind the insecurities and mistakes that had plagued me.
- I started a relationship with someone that I genuinely cared about.
- I grew in my relationship with my church, family, and God.
- I started all over at OSU.
- I met new people, some that I can say are my best friends.
- I ended up losing him not only as a boyfriend but also as a friend.
- I cried.
- I moved on.
- I finished my first semester.
- I reconnected with people that I hadn’t talked to in years.
- I learned so much.
Honestly, I loved 2014.
But the thing about a new year and a new slate is having to let all of those memories go. And that scares me. You would think that letting go of all the bad memories would be a relief, but some how I don’t want to let those go either. It may be because I learned specifics lessons from each of them and grew because of hardships I went through. Or it also may be that some part of me enjoys wallowing in the self pity that these memories bring. It may most likely be the latter. I also don’t want to let go of all the amazing memories I shared in 2014. Memories that I shared with people that I also struggle with leaving in 2014.
Regardless, New Years is always a bit of a depressing time for me. But something I am learning to embrace is change. And change comes with letting go and moving on. This year I have made it one of my resolutions to make this year memorable. I have also made it a resolution to let go of things when it’s their time to go.
And speaking of resolutions, here is a list of all of mine.
- Let go of anything that is no longer healthy, happy, or helpful.
- Find a bit of happiness in every day.
- Take more pictures.
- Become more regular with my blog posts.
- Last, but not least, watch all of Friends (which to be honest won’t take very long since I’m already on Season 7…no shame)
Hope everyone makes 2015 a year to remember!